The Real Internet Blues (Cultural Rave)

You’re never quite asking to change, you’re never quite asking to be validated. There’s validation in changing yourself.

When who you are is validated, the world could be changing. When you desire something, you want to feel like that desire mattered. But you also want to see what flaws might have been in your desire.

Am I the only one who sees the internet’s blues for what they are? It’s not just people wanting validation, which would be kind of tragic. It’s not just seeking change, because the internet’s too damn fun for that.

I wholeheartedly believe the internet could be the final step to making us better people. But only if someone can carry the weight. If only someone can show it off. If only someone can put the pieces together.

But it’s hard, because when you try to tell anyone that there’s something out there they don’t see, you accuse them of lacking the vision to do anything special, and to make your dreams come true in a fragmented world, by using that fragmentation willingly, is about as special as it gets.

That’s what great protagonists do. That’s what makes a hero you can’t even describe.

Am I a puzzle solver or just someone with the blues? If you could read this, could you see what I mean? Would it be so obvious, that you couldn’t possibly see me as relevant? Are you unwilling to see that one person might deconstruct what it means to feel like a protagonist?

We all know we’re not the main character, but we all feel special anyway. But what else is it we do that makes us feel like the one who could really be rising above every other person?

Am I really the first person to say this so eloquently? Is this not a theory I’ve seen before? I really haven’t seen it said before. In response to why the internet is the way it is.

You can’t connect people to actions properly, but by doing that, you change others’ dreams, which are responsible for making the future. And people always dream big, making unreasonable connections to actions and people, so somebody has to be the curator. Somebody has to be the one with the most influence. That’s why most internet arguments don’t get very far. There’s always the possibility of doing something good for someone in whatever you do, and that includes weird or unfair judgments about other people.

That’s what everyone exploits in ways that are easy to find disgusting or wholesome. And that’s the essence of actions you love, hate, laugh at, or get massively impressed by. The small spark of being a self-interested but also kind bastard managing to maneuver its ways around people and society and nature and everyone else’s dreams.

All I know is, I didn’t fail to take the proverbial shot. I didn’t sit down and do nothing. I fucking tried my best better than I ever thought I could have. And I’ll keep trying as long as I can to bring that change. A world where know what it is when we look in each other’s eyes and feel desire we can’t explain.

Only when I see real folks be as good to each other as they claim to be, will I have done what I came to do. There’s somebody I’ve got to beat, and that’s the everyman smiling at their actions and failing to be just the kind of person they think they are. So far, I’ve only beaten one of these people, and that’s my old self. I’m too much of a fighter to stop here. Too aware of how it feels to congratulate oneself imperfectly and how that’s the source of so much stuff we’d like to see get fixed once and for all.

L1’s Almanac – To Adjust Your Sails Is Still Kind of Evil

Have you seen this saying?

“We can’t direct the wind, but we can adjust the sails”.

You could say….quite a few good things about that saying. How to try and change your future by taking indirect control of things.

But I want you to think about how this is part of behavior you hate, people you resent.

Maybe it’s a boss, maybe it’s a politician, maybe it’s a family member, and some kind of celebrity you used to admire.

Those people know how to distance themselves from their actions. They know how to use detachment from responsibility for their own benefit. They know how to treat other people like the wind.

They can, through minor changes in how they talk, how they walk, how to move things from point A to point B, allow factors outside of themselves to benefit them very much.

What you see as responsible self-guidance and adjustment to outside factors, can also be seen as exploitation of other people, and arrogant risking of other people’s well-being.

The desire to manipulate and the will to guide are really just different shades of a similar color. You know that already, and that’s what makes it so easy to admire or despise someone for actually managing to come out on top in a tricky social scenario.

Perhaps there really are people who lack more than a shred of kindness within them and become all about raw exploitation of anyone of anyone they meet

but if you want to get the most out of evil-seeming people, the best thing is to try to see….what makes them feel like sail adjusters, like explorers on the ocean, who may or may not be pirates depending upon what happens to their supplies.

Why do they feel so very proud and free, when doing things that make you want to tear your hair out? So much of what you see as sneering evil is really a massive sense of value that comes from navigating a world that is always only dubiously reliable.

Even the most blatant and rare evil comes from seeing everyone else as even more eager to exploit you than they ever were.

Learn to see how everyone knows it’s a little bit foolish to pin blame or praise onto anyone, but you can use that to gently guide the winds of fate.

See what makes them feel softly strong, and you can become much better at riding the winds. And maybe someday, the people who really do hate exploitation might be competent enough to run the highest office.

I’d only sail around the world after that takes place- when the emotional pirates can somehow enjoy sailing on their own without desiring even more.

L1’s Almanac- Why People Are Like Glorious Christmas Light Clusterfucks (The Greatest Post I’ll Ever Make)

After a night of good memeing, I woke up with my brain cells realigned.

And I reached a conclusion about……what people are doing.

Even about the very nature of what I am trying to do.

And I also became extremely proud of myself,

for having an original take on how to try to be a good person.

What gives a person a sense

as though they are in the right place?

That they have become valuable, that their dreams matter?

Well, we can agree, that it is probably a combination of self-interest, altruism, and animal desires being fulfilled.

But what makes a person think they’re on the right track?

What makes a person light up?

What makes someone so very hard to change?

I think the best metaphor is the feeling you get

when you turn on a Christmas tree despite having a faulty setup.

Or, you know, some kind of……magnificently freaky holiday decoration setup….

where the lights aren’t quite organized, where the circuitry is possibly dangerous, where laws about energy usage may be violated, and which other neighbors might even be appalled by.

Yes, what makes you really shine, that thing, I want you to be in touch with.

I’ll sum it up in four words, unlike the me that has been struggling to communicate his ideas for so very long.

People are guided by this:

Imperfect connections breeding possibilities.

People aren’t most proud of a properly slacked wire, or a neatly trimmed hedge, or a symmetrical star on their tree, or buying the most popular decorations.

They are proud of the weird decorations, the tangled lights, the crooked star, the bush stuffed with tchotchkes.

Inside of an endearingly messy front yard, is the essence of a person actually managing to birth their deepest dreams, proof of humble struggles, evidence of appreciation for festivity.

This is my light show, my explosion of ingenuity, to call attention to what it is that makes us feel as though we are loving geniuses.

I’m accusing myself of being a billion times smarter than anyone else….and of anyone else being a million times smarter than they think they are.

Are you ready……to understand human nature at last?

The dubious accusation of crime or malice.
The barely deserved affection for any small efforts.
The infinite rage toward stuff you like preferences that don’t seem to affect your own.
The love of ethical leaders who have only proven to be vaguely useful.

Why are these feelings so strong?

I’m sure all four of these things you have strong opinions about, depending on which crime, which act of kindness, which movie, which politician.

All four of these things are example of connections which people know are faulty.

They are all like lights plugged in so innovatively and obscenely.

People know that, especially as adults, that you can’t simply try to be a good person and expect things to work out. Or even feel satisfied with yourself.

It’s like trying to follow a handbook on how to set up decorations….
when your house is far too weirdly shaped.

In order to navigate the possibilities in your life…
in order for your dream of “I am great and I am nice” to actually survive
to be able to feel your own light glow,
to be able to bring color into anyone else’s life,

you have to do things in a way that feels rather crude and ugly.
And having done that, you hug your accomplishments and feel massive affection for yourself.

Every time you try to change someone’s beliefs,
you’re not dealing with soldiers guarding a gate.

When you try to tell someone they’re evil or undignified or useless or just plain mediocre
you’re trying to fight an army of silly animatronic decorations
on a poorly built staircase with wreathes and ornaments arranged to fit on those ugly ramps.

How many times…..are you going to try and change someone
without ever connecting the punch to the face of an opinion?
It’s just like that nightmare where the hits never land.

You know it’s not happening.
It’s not working.

Every time you post, you can feel some kind of weird mediocrity to your actions.

Internet arguments can change people
but I know you can feel it’s NOT WORKING.
We all see that game, but only people like me have come close to explaining what that game is.

We’re all trying to play the same game of making other people feel like fools
when they already feel like fools, but those who find ways to GET SHIT DONE.

You’re trying to make other people feel weak and incompetent
when they already know what it means to OVERCOME AND ADAPT to so much great futility they have.

All of these deep philosophical arguments go and on and on,
and the desire for people to be nice to each other doesn’t fucking change.

That desire gets so ugly in its need to feel like it matters despite how hard it is
to feel dignified when you have to live up the standards of others.

And so people act like wizards doing magic,
shooting gentle-feeling amounts of blame over here,
firing blasts of imperfect shame over there,
feeling metaphysical but really only making loose linkage among actions,
hoping that other people sprout into a kind person just like them,
who can never really judge anything in an ideal way,
but who feel their own sense of worth manage to breathe,
because the circuits in their head say “from a fragmented but unified reality
I can make being nice absurdly step into the future.”

The social spellcasting we do hurts so many people.

We praise the blame that we don’t care leads to shame, because it embodies the possibility of people changing their own kindness.

We blame the praise that we see leads to arrogance, because it enables the birth of someone else’s well intentioned confidence.

We blame the civil-acting blame in others because it feels like a corruption of who should be praised.

We praise the borderline moronic-acting praise in others because it feels like supercharging kindness.

Maybe now you see a little more clearly how likely is it is to become loveable or hateable with little room in between.

The circuitry of what desires and dreams to egregiously back
for the sake of becoming so very viable beyond mere hopes.

We make deep arguments about who should do what in which situation
that we know can’t really become highly valuable guides to being human,
but that we can feel really changing how others dream of being socially decent,
satisfying that hot urge between your eyes when purposes and results seem to be melding.

The belligerent clusterfucks we are likely to become
that feel so heartwarmingly neat and useful feeling,
are so very guaranteed to piss off and heartwarm millions at once.

If you don’t believe my theory, let me beg you this-
peace won’t come until we can solve the thin line between asshole and badass.
That’s the issue that needs to be solved!
You can change so few things and badass and asshole become each other.
Polarization has a logic to it,
and it has to do with how eager we are to attach and detach actions and people
in a way that seems so very fitting to our own dream of being nice.

And in this chore of connecting things to things,
and carefully detangling wires and filtering out some circuitry,
we look at our approach to trying to be nice and say, “this feels pretty epic”.

But because it’s not easy to connect anything the right way,
or know which social strategies to avoid or not,
we often become like houses set on fire thanks to faulty electronics.
One person declaring, “how shameful you reckless wretch”,
and the other, I am not ashamed at trying to be beautiful,
and the stories make the headlines,

while we tell giant epics about motherfucking risk-making fate-benders who can be both shameful and dignified in the hopes they might guide us to better kindness.

My philosophy, my discovery, the found emotion, is the embodiment of what you find so very sweet and savory in the types of well-intentioned traitors in fictional stories.

When you see the mole come out after 10 years in hiding, why does that set you on fire?

The most hateable and loveable ways that people can be
are such because they embody
the desire to fulfill results without the need for proper feeling intentions.

You can’t allocate blame or praise in a proper quantity, you never could. But you still want to find how much to give. That’s what makes our hearts yearn for villains be villainous, but still lose to the general peace-loving public. They want to bend where people should allocate value in life and effort.

Our motivation, as people, as a collective, has never been to be perfect, nor could it ever have been. Our desires our too big for that, society requires too many resources for that, space and time itself may make any ideal moral alignment not possible. Even dogmatic people believe there are many contradicting ways to be a good person! How else would you build a civilization?

Our motivation as humans is to align things outside of us
just so ridiculously and fabulously
that our inner child
that just wants to be seen as decent
manages to feel warm.

The key to a peaceful world is not something that bizarre, because it’s an ability you already have- the power to see when people are crafting results out of purposes.

I see it already in so many people- the power to navigate social situations with both drives and standards. We are very proud of this, and this is our biggest friend and enemy.

Just look at what lies between goals and actions-
the making of very strange disconnections and connections
involving people, events, actions, and results
so that the light you want can shine so fiercely
rather than failing to make it through the powerlines.

Everyone is putting on that show, and we only need to see it for what it is
to make the final adjustments.
I dream of a new stage of civilization,
where we can look into each other’s eyes and see what we are trying to do each other!
You could call it considerate exploitation,
detached-feeling editing and altering of someone else,
which can be so very gentle-feeling or duplicitous,
but is most often, just trying to get by,
just what you do when you go to the grocery store.

In the world I dream of, my very average and normal philosophy,
is responsible for changing things in ways we were already creating the potential to happen.

Have a cup of hot chocolate, will you?


____

Now, 10 things you will see differently after reading this. Contradictions unwrapped like golden holiday gifts.

1. Comedy both massages and encourages the will do things in just the wrong way.

2. Love validates and gives modesty to the urge to connect indulgently to other people.

3. The creation of art violates and enhances the will to make things properly.

4. Government is endearing because control and lack of control over other people are always imperfectly linked.

5. Storytelling is popular because description and prescription belong together but cannot fuse together.

6. Fear is never either for something’s qualities or what it it does, but people who exploit that are creepy because they can make possibilities based on your feelings.

7. Work is never totally fulfilling or not, which is why employers feel comfortable with they shit they do that barely seems decent. They are always being exploited by someone else too, and workers and always gaining something.

8. Getting and receiving presents is fun, because we can feel the imperfect value of any action being used creatively.

9. Holiday myths encourage other people to always remember to bit a ridiculous when trying to be a good person.

10. Christmas commercials are fucking great because corporate greed is never separated from the desire to be charitable. Giving and getting by giving or getting…..that’s the game!

HAVE A GREAT FUCKING HOLIDAY

I KNOW I FEEL LIKE A FUCKING CHRISTMAS HOUSE

AM I GETTING THROUGH TO YOU??

IS THIS THE MOMENT WHERE I GET TO FEEL LIKE THE OPRAH OF THE INTERNET??

ARE YOU READY TO CHANGE THE ENTIRE WARUDO?



L1’s Almanac – Why Trying to be Socially Competent is Like a Game Show Where You Jump Through Stupid Foam Cutouts

Have you seen the game show Hole in the Wall?

People have to fits themselves through a space in a wall that is supposedly made just for them as it glides down an alley, or else you are dumped into the water.

It’s a show that makes me smile, so silly, so endearing. But why?

Maybe because…..the challenge is perfectly out place.

This space in a wall is matched to the shape of your body, if you can find the position.

But of course, finding that position is much harder than it looks.

If you win, you have done something so very endearingly basic as molding into a cut out…that almost any flexbility young fool could stuff themselves into….

if you had enough time.

It’s very hard, but contains the essence of easiness.

When people have trouble fitting in, at work or home or those they want to be close to,

it always feels like the challenge is almost finished…..if you can do some thing to these people. But in that closeness to the goal, it’s very upsettingly far.

Game shows are about people trying to do things that are in ways, very simple, and in others, very difficult. Depending on who has what abilities, who manages to make the right guess, and who makes the right adjustments the final rounds, someone will…come…on….top.

But no matter how many hoops you jump through in awkward, rewarding success, like a person on a strange game show, the need to feel like you’ve adjusted yourself properly goes on and on. As it probably should.

But what is that adjusting that you do?

How do you gain a sense of stable flexibility in your life?

What maximizes your chances of actually fitting through the hole,

so that you can feel proud, for just a few moments, and gain the proud ability to carry on with greater confidence?

What makes us feel morally….alright with ourselves?

I will tell you…..it’s something that people are very likely to love and hate us for doing.

The answer is…..making imperfect connections. Exploiting how nothing is really quite connected to anything else.

Now, if you want to go deeper, you can read the rest of this blog, but let me try and explain in the context of this silly game show.

The only way to make your way through the hole…..is to have the proper balance of flexibility and stability.

As the wall hits your body, you must be willing to make adjustments within the last few fragments of seconds in time. Sometimes very slight, or maybe with a large change in plans.

But if you are not stiff, if you are not committed to a certain bodily pose, your chances of success….are also likely very low.

When we are trying to belong somewhere, or reach a goal, we do our best to balance how much we are willing to change our approach to being both……effective and decent….

versus how much we will take a stand in our own version of practically kind behavior.

You have probably heard this type of talk from plenty of other people.

But allow me to introduce a concept that makes my blog very unique among all other intellectual content.

Here is my original metaphor. This is what you will not get elsewhere.

A tightened muscle or a well planted leg….can also be a metaphor for declaring what is connected to what.

A loose limb or a bendy tendon can represent….feeling what is separated from what.

In order to reach a dream, or rather, to also feel as that you are providing yourself with the ability to reach dreams, and even honoring whatever dream-reaching potential anyone could ever have…

humans must make connections and disconnections they know aren’t quite reasonable or fair to make.

And will indeed be comforted by actually having dreams and goals actually surviving, despite how unreliable just trying to be productive, kind, and civil can be for anyone.

I do not really see anyone as all that much more selfish or selfless, or loving or hateful than anyone else. We are all caught up in a similar behavior that is just very hard to see, but I think I have seen it.

The making of moral or credit-giving connections from people to their actions is strange to do so proudly, as is suggesting separating people from what they do.

Linking people to the will or the needs of other people they associate with or have a relationship with is strange, so is absolving the people of their connections.

Connecting events not caused by people to human responsibility is strange, but it would be foolish to relinquish trying to have a proper grasp upon things not caused by us.

You only need to look at the internet to find a good example of what I am talking about.
You log on, eager to make close but distant connections to strangers on their forums.

And the things you say to other people online…..they are usually not of the particularly vengefully disgusted or fanatically fond sort.

Your average internet post is somewhat snarky, somewhat complimenting, somewhat hopeful of trying to change things, somewhat hopeless about anything making any advances, somewhat of a relief from other things in your life, somewhat a way to validate your passion for anything else in your life.

Let me tell you, my dear sweet human who has stumbled upon this website….

if you can see what the average internet post really is, you will understand human nature in a way that makes you feel absolutely amazing

All of these posts…..these mini documentaries…..these internet streamers…….and anyone who is not even on the goddamned internet in the first place……

they know that you can’t properly connect to anything to anyone in just the right way, or link anything to any person in a way that feels proper.

Because as time marches forward in space, possibilities do wind.

People are all trying to link themselves and their allies to things that will uplift them, rather unfairly!

But it’s not as evil as you think. Because only by flexing stiffly can your dreams actually manage to to be born, as possibility marches on.

People are always detaching themselves from responsibility, unlinking themselves from obvious flaws that they should not be proud of nearly so much!

But to them, it doesn’t feel malicious…..because the fantasy of coming out neatly on top can only come from relaxing those muscles of shame.

With the exception of small children who actually are fairly innocent, almost all accusations of immorality or depravity or weakness in someone else….

are made with the knowing it’s not a very elegant thing to do, and that it shouldn’t be the standard for how to talk to anyone, even enemies.

Kind compliments from a stranger on the internet are made knowing that…..there are many things that one can do the build up others and be socially responsible, that make internet niceness look almost upsettingly quaint.

But you know, deep down, that by discouraging someone else’s ambitions or pride,

or lifting up another person’s sources of inspiration or dignity,

you can indeed make situations, so strangely, so indirectly, actually fucking take place.

The essence of fulfilling dreams….that is your ally and your enemy.

the game we all play….never being too proud of pinning anything onto anyone, or absolving anything from one, but very glad indeed…….that from that unreasonable act, goals can indeed be reached.

Of course I would not say that most interactions with others playing that game involve simply trying to aid them or hurt them. So many things in life are like a game show where…..you are a spectator and not an ally. You can throw balls onto an obstacle course to help someone slip up, or they can use them to score points by throwing them into a hoop.

Doesn’t that excite you? The notion of not knowing if you’re helping someone or not?

People test other people, but that is how good allies are made. They manipulate others, but good manipulators abilities are born from that. They mess around with their responsibilities, but in doing so deflect being mistreated.

People, don’t care about being good or doing good things as much as they care about feeling like what they do somehow manages to be adored by someone.

And so much nasty behavior gets born out of that….and too many people honor playing that game of making unreasonable connections for some kind of good purpose far more than they should. That is my theory on why you see…..people being so very brash with each other, in ways that you find possibly inspiring or disgusting. By balancing blame and praise, disgust and dreams, weirdness and normalcy, control and spontaneity, rebellion and tradition, in a way that feels just the right kind of silly,

so you can fit through the walls, or maybe someone do the same.

But I want people to become a little bit more in touch with this outlandish game,

of barely justified connection,

because some of us aren’t so good at playing it,

and should know how it works,

Maybe utopia is where social skills aren’t needed, but are had.

In that place, no culture is in charge.

I admit…I want to win the game of changing the world more than anyone,

and reaching the point where people can barely believe I didn’t sort out humanity the way I did.

But I told someone….I was a warrior of human emotion. And if I seem like a game show contestant stumbling in the water…..I’d rather be that than a person who never plays the game of trying to be champion.









[Purpose-Result Friction] Theory Diaries – The Charm of the Lost Receipt (Gratification For/Against Thieves)

The windowsill in my apartment building…………

I found a receipt on it.

I was tempted to pick it up.

I did pick it up.

It was from Subway, the sandwich shop.

They got…..some kind of normal sandwich, whatever.

But you see……I was excited.  I was glad.

Because I could see how deeply wanting to pick up that receipt was

linked to so many other things about being human.

People long to connect to the experiences of everyone else….but they’re also enticed by the distance between them and others.   You could say that creating proper distance between you and others is part of the goal to connecting to someone else. 

Picking up a receipt is a way of feeling closer to a stranger, but it feels pretty dignified, because only by peering into someone’s dreams can find out how to please them.

The desire to peer into someone else’s life is such a violation of their privacy.   Picking up a receipt is a very minor version of that.   But because it’s so innocent, so unlikely to cause harm or even actually be “private snooping” that it feels so much like an intrusion.

Learning someone’s secrets makes you feel powerful and also like you’re increasing your empathy.  That’s why it’s so hard to keep people from interfering with other people.  That’s why trying to be nice to your family is such a struggle- you always have to be interfering.

People ache to feel like the empathic one.  The one who relates, the one who feels.  The one who can manipulate others and themselves toward some kind of benevolent goal.  The one who can adapt to someone else’s dreams and be truly worth appreciating.

That heat is at the core of why a person would pick up a stranger’s receipt.  Why it feels out of place……why it feels so very appropriate.

Because only by causing others some degree of discomfort and anger can we get them to become more agreeable and adaptable.

You have to be a little ashamed to do anything to glow with joy about what you did.

Looking at someone’s receipt, if they could catch you, is probably likely to either be very endearing, or fairly enraging. 

I know if I caught someone else looking at a receipt I dropped, I’d probably have a raised eyebrow, partly aggravated, partly charmed that someone was willing to peer into a small piece of a life that happened to be mine.

Someone could be very glad to see that happen, that someone else would care, just barely enough, and greatly enough, to look at a marker of their recent past.  That through curiosity and boredom, something they did, so innocently, could become someone else’s amusement.   That they, through their dream of the possibility of becoming closer to someone else, though, intrusively, were inspired to pick up a likely useless shred of paper off the floor.  

They could even find it endearing that their preference for bought items was exposed to someone else.

A different person could be

infuriated at someone nabbing their lost receipt, even for something innocuous as buying a sandwich.   Yes, there was no intention at targeting you specifically, and anyone could be the “victim”.  Yes, the piece of paper might not have any function for its finder.  Yes, it’s your fault for losing it rather than keeping it in your pocket.

But your eyes could still turn red with rage at someone looking at it.   And why is that?

Because people are always acting as though it’s not you they’re trying to affect when they’re trying to get you to do things their way.

And you know it’s wrong to accuse people of trying to learn your secrets, or criticize your experiences, when they are only stumbling upon a remnant of your recent past.

And you know that you wouldn’t necessarily try to intrude into someone else’s life for the sake of your own gain, unless you had a reason that felt valid. 

Nobody is constantly trying to make other people’s lives about them.  Nobody is trying to cheat or swindle everyone.

It would make certain people feel angry to see someone touch their receipt, because of just how disconnected-acting that intrusion is.

But other people might be willing to use such a situation in a better way.    

Some people are on a higher level, in touch with their own rage, knowing how to utilize it, knowing how to provoke others for the sake of a pleasant dream.  

Those people are hustlers.

They are the types who are willing to ensnare people in

accusations they know are barely justified, not for a feeling of justice, but for the sake of living in a way that feels productive and classy.

And it’s a lack of emotional awareness in normal, non-stealing people, which leads to not only the unfixable blight of already-can-afford-to-eat thievery, but also,

those few of us knaves making a shame-free living out of fucking with other people’s hopes and dreams.

It’s wrong to blame the common people for the work of rogues….but I believe that as things are, the common people are not doing what they can to make those rogues not ecstatic to steal your stuff.

We get seem to get completely mad or happy with an odd use of political power, and have yet to figure out how to keep corrupt politicians from doing what they have.

Pilferers, shoplifters, bank robbers, white collar criminals……they don’t feel evil.   Why is this?

Because they’ve overcome their own anger at people possibly maybe trying to take things from them.

What allows this disgrace to exist is the empathy they have not only for desperate accusations, but conniving false ones.

True hustlers can expect someone kind of sort of trying to get up in their business,
and knowing they might have a good reason for that, or that they really might not. They’ll smile at you, because they have gotten past the point of dismay at anyone turning out to be kind of a major fuckface, or actually very noble.

Those who steal don’t merely operate on self interest or exhaustion with moralistic suggestions.

Nor is it that they respect those who shove others into a pile of dirt with only vaguely good justifications.

They know that other people are always counting on the possibility of
tricking people into thinking they’re not doing what they actually have been doing.

That everyone is always just a bit of a hustler, an abject blamer, an unwanted praise giver, in a way that’s silly, but useful, and strangely not ugly.

The person who steals the candy bar…..sees the world as a game based upon acting like you’re not already taking things based from other people.

The person who nabs millions of dollars of museum artifacts can sense that the museum is itself, some kind of thief who acts much better.

Anyone who takes something that doesn’t belong to them can use it in a way that might shock the person whose materials have just been stolen.

Money, gifts, treasures, all of these things can be converted to experiences that could hardly be described as malicious.

A thief has the power to overcome their own guilt, to get beyond others constantly wanting to conform to them, to do something good for themselves which others claim couldn’t possibly possess a shred of dignity.

But dignity comes from the desire to create possibilities, in spite of how fragmented everything is.

Nobody can be quite connected to their ethics, none can be linked to their wishes for anything.

People can never be purely characterized as anything, nobody can really be said to be responsible for anything. The world has far too many vaguely linked will floating around.

But you also can’t really escape that either.  People know that they are guilty, that they’ve done wrong, that it’s foolish to claim to responsibility. That causes and affects ain’t being split. That heroes of justice really are heroes of justice, and that those longing to uphold that justice are totally being fair.

But we look at those vile robbers, of things, of dreams, of happiness, even of life, as though they couldn’t possibly be doing anything truly worth giving credit for.

The worst criminals feel, “I AM MAKING SHIT HAPPEN” and “I DO NOT FEEL BAD ABOUT MYSELF” and go on doing what they do, because we give ourselves positive feedback for similar misdeeds. Or rather, we are not condemning them in a way that feels like anywhere near adequate.

Even thieves know how to be gentle and adaptable with someone they’re not stealing from, or even the people who they are taking from.

Everyone steps around the unjust accusations of others.

I wish for nobody to take what isn’t theirs.  I fantasize about peace and love and kindness like you do.

But this day can only come when we see that “deserving what you own” itself

is a belligerent game that inspires so much confident breaking of rules.

Everyone is a bit of a rogue, innovating self-interest as well as the lack of barbarity in it.

Adapting to situations, having the power to remain inspired despite others’ resentment, and risking so much just to get by the constraints of how society wants your destiny to play out- that is what makes a great hustler feel like the highest form of human being.

The type of person that needs taken down a peg, while wistful weirdos who just want the hustling to stop…..can stop fucking around and be good at leading even the most socially competent swindlers.

The power to reach bizarrely attainable goals, and the power to feel like your closeness to others is enhanced, rather than violated by causing anyone sore frustration, the ability to feel so attached from ordinary and common kindness while finding your own way to validate the goal of BEING NICE,

that is the power of humans, that is what needs to be reigned in for progress to happen on Earth.

My fierce desire is to crush the heart of people who feel like they’re blossoming with warm rainbows of love when

gently and stylishly exploiting the ever mega loving fuck

out of the desires and expectations of other people who are more “I just want to be a good person” types.

And have them regenerate under the banner of “I will not be a cosmic hustler”.

Not that anyone isn’t a hustler.

If you could just understand what it means to want to pick a up a receipt, less people would want to rob a fucking bank. 

We could all just be inspired by proper but creative closeness to others rather than elegantly improper exploitation of anyone.

And that’s….my dream for civilization.

For us to be disconnected and connected from our actions in just the right way to get shit done, without our eyes glowing with transcendent triumph.

Or you could just throw your receipt away and see what happens.






[Purpose-Result Friction] Theory Diaries – The Electric Desk Fan Button Situation Theorem (A Solution for Humanity)

There’s an electric fan on my desk.  I use it very often.

I get warm, even in winter.

You turn it on by pushing down a button.

It makes a click when you push it.

But if you don’t push down all the way, the fan still activates.

The click I associated with the fan was not actually required to turn it on.

What an odd thing to regard.

So much like a betrayal,

The sensation of something was not linked to its purpose.

So aggravating, so mysteriously endearing.

My theory makes it less so.

You see, to connect anything to anything is a bizarre game.

Thereby the source of my frustration over being wrong about

the purpose and result of the button click

Isn’t so much about feeling foolish

as much as it is an insult

to the part of me

that knows that enjoying the clicking of the button was already kind of lame to do.

I smiled at my desk fan for its involuntary deception.

I knew that part of the blame belonged to me,

Part of it upon who made the device.

For the button not needing to be clicked, but only pressed, to serve its function.

I knew this quality of the button

was either some kind of quality that makes the product easier to manufacture,

Or perhaps designing it any other way would have been a waste.

It is not clear what is a function

or what is a missing feature,

or what it is a choice made against your convenience,

or just someone exploiting a process for their own sake.

That’s the game we play,

always not quite trying to do thing an elegant way

so that our dreams don’t require too much effort

to become sustainable and viable.

If you push down your finger on the button,

or invent some item that could clamp itself to the fan and the button,

You could keep the fan on without the click happening,

Leaving my finger right there,

I feel a warm sensation, an electric motivation,

Not quite just feeling the blade move because of me.

It has something to do with proud irrelevance.


Knowing that the button needs only a press and not a click,

I felt as though I was the one who achieved what it was meant to do.

and also, I was defying what it was manufactured for.

It’s when we feel properly useless,

or improperly useful

that we are secure in what we do.

Of course, I am not secure with how the world is,

or with anyone else’s way of telling me what I did was wrong.

Are you feeling electric?

Are you a fan of this post?


Do you understand, that the reason why people are so proud of themselves for trying to change the world,

is because they feel as though they have the right balance of “purpose fulfillment” and “destiny defiance”?

It’s hard to change anyone who feels like they are both a changer and stabilizer of the world they live in.

By holding the button on the deskfan, and releasing softly, I could control so easily whether it was on or off. It was like I was operating the machine like a car.

But I needed the button to click if I wanted to walk elsewhere.

The plastic needed to pass a certain place,

For me to relinquish control of the fan, and increase ability to use the fan.


If I were to invent an item to clamp down the fan just enough,

I would be proud of myself for claiming power,

To do something I already could with the fan’s original functions.

It would be my effort, allowing the desk fan to operate,

It would also only be a silly attempt to alter the function of the device.

What is something done by you, or what is happening not according to you? 

How can we give anything purpose if it involves changing something?

Inside these two questions

Is what makes us feel electric, like somehow the valency of what we do is properly active.

The electrons of what your actions are desired to feel properly placed both in and outside you.

as they move so vigorously.

This is what makes us human, and what animals don’t have- knowing that things people do are never purely attached to them.



If your mind is a little bit blown right now, I want to tell you how much I love you for it.

Because I know it isn’t just me trying to do the thing I want to do.


To make the world a better place, for real,

by letting you see the mechanics behind unusual, uncuttable pride in one’s loose grip on the lives of other people.

Everyone wishes for people to serve each other more than hurt each other.

People become very proud of their minor reinventions of

“being nice” they know are not too radical.

And that fair self-congratulation motivates so very much burning hatred.

The deepest forms of positive personal growth-

the powerful ability to navigate possibilities,

and the power to feel dignified despite errors,

as well as the ability to bend others’ fate despite your weakness,

becomes what others despise most.

That’s the answer to “why is there so much hate in the world”.

People feeling really fucking cool, for the ability to make shit happen and hold their heads up high,

and those people get told they’re worthless,

when they already know they cause others to suffer,

just like everyone else does.

That’s what makes us such a horribly dangerous badass.

The ability to feel stably strong.

People become so very disgustingly strong, don’t they?

Even those whom you hate the most.


Confronting these individuals who we know are just like us but not,

we try and get just the right amount of justice against them.

That whimsical and soft revenge against poorly functioning kindness

is at the heart of the behaviors you adore as well as despise.

The essence of civil outcry

is the essence of brutal shunning

is the essence of a street scuffle

is the essence of a violent outrage.


The insulting of one’s strength to change the future and be proud of themselves is what causes people to become fucked up.

People try to hold down the button of unlikely, non-vain kindness with the right balance of force and gentleness, using tools they had to conjure to get by, or that they made with the desire to surpass the unkindness they suffered.

People crave people being better to other people, and to satisfy that craving in controversial ways produces massive self-worth that does so much hurt.

People feel so amazingly and unnecessarily good at being unusually decent, and when someone is an indecent type of decent, fingers get broken.

And those broken fingers do indeed warp the world into potentially becoming somewhat more good at fostering kindness and dignity.

So cultural warfare takes place, someone wanting the monopoly on humble feeling ambition,

which others despise so fully.

This is my answer to cultural warfare.

The decent already feel as though they’re powerfully but properly indecent.

And others get off real hard on seeing others do that

in a way they find pleasing.

Seeing that will to be decently indecent, you can navigate someone’s bizarre dignity,

and change them without them knowing.

Of course, doing that is why people are so proud in their cultures.

Navigation of the freakish dignity of others is what makes a person ultra mega secure in themselves,

and it’s something I would like to make less poorly tamed and self-congratulating.

If people knew this game they were playing, “being nice” would barely even be something to argue about.

We’d be left with preferences about how to act, what to do, what to say, how to be,

but still be on the same page about how to be nice.

Those with the strongest desire to make humans kinder would stop stumbling like baby deer,

crying for the day when world peace comes,

and actually know how to influence others to not being an asshole.




I myself have a decent power to cut through human belligerence, which is indeed not as vile as I once believed.

And if others could inherit my ability to walk through a social space, without being too proud,

I’m confident things would be more dignified here on Earth.

I can see when people are being the weird exceptions to “just be civil, just be kind”.

The genius in all of us socially competent adults

knows that all connections made are egregious.


I want to make a less ugly world,
through the power of my own genius attempt
at validating the genius in others,
who knows nothing is quite connected to anything,
but connecting things is necessary for anything to happen.


Humanity becoming more civil is not necessary,

but it is possible,

and I want to help give birth to that dream.

I can feel it in you.

That’s what you want.

I want you to have it.

You only need to see people see themselves as the proper and reasonable exploiter
of the fucked up tradition of connecting anything to anyone.

Then we can finally cool off together,

the button of “how to be kind” finally pushed instead of pressed so awkwardly.





Cultural Rave: The Warm Mystique of Celebrating Holidays and Anniversaries (L1: Redemptive Revengeance)

I am making my 60th post.

Don’t you think it’s charming?

How we try to pin special qualities toward marching forward,

only reaching a number or passing some interval in time.

We celebrate how long businesses and clubs have been around,

how long we have been alive,

the achievements of humans who have vanished from physical presence,

and even occurrences in nature which involved

no one particularly trying to change anything about anything.

Lives and deaths are made occasions.

Dreams and disasters are made into holidays.

Special events are made out of events which will no longer happen.

And we place them onto points according to a certain amount of spaces away from each other.

We know it is arbitrary to celebrate anything at all,

even things which just happened, things which benefit us obviously.

The desire to make holidays and anniversaries is not really a mere tradition

or a pathetic excuse to try and make meaning out of anything happening anywhere,

No, that’s not it. Choosing to anniversarize anything at all

is endearing, because regarding anything as impressive or praise worthy

is something we all know has a very dubious value.

Humans are humbled by their own dream of giving value to anything,

of being pathetically driven to make anything happen through learning from

the errors inside the goal of human kindness.

Inside of a holiday, inside an anniversary,

is a heart leaning towards what feels like glory.

And I support that aspiration for being very glorious,

and wanting to do great things for other people,

for what else could possibly be a goal with any worth?

If that is your goal,

if that is anyone’s goal,

I think it can only be enhanced by seeing what holidays really are to people.

In a holiday, people feel beneath the achievements of others, and also seethe to surpass them. You’ve got humbleness, you’ve got vanity.

On a civil holiday, people enjoy feeling like servants to society, but more assured that someone else is living the wrong way, who isn’t part of that group.

On a holiday, you’re motivated to increase the kindness that may exist somewhere in this world, but you also smile at the unkindness you want to break apart.

To insist that anything is worth making a FUCKING day over

is exactly the type of thing that people everywhere find endearing.

Because humans aspire to be strong, with the right limitations.

They desire leisure, with the of goal increasing productivity.

They want to have fun and be freaky, but in a way other people approve of.

They want to prop other people in ways that are are a little bit fucked up,

so that fucked up pieces of shit don’t take over society.

Holidays with particularly flashy celebrations

allow us to get a little bit closer to separating the “wacky assholes” from the “cool fellows”.

by giving us ways to be weird within the expectations of society.

And that’s not something I can condemn.

Because if people step outside in the morning trying only to be an ordinarily kind person,

it’s not likely to work out.

There has to be contingency for embarrassing failure,

for crippling desperation to feel as though others’ praise is actually worthwhile.

That’s the type of thing holidays enrich inside of us:

the notion that someone’s whimsy of self-worth has a chance to stand on its legs.

But it has yet to really happen.

___

I love holidays. I don’t shit on people

for celebrating their YouTube channel being around for 50 days.

That’s what people should do.

We should honor egregiously.

We should eat and dance and do all sorts of random fucking shit

within the confines of human civility.

But for fuck’s fucking sake….where is the civility now?

Where the hell did it all go?

We’re nice enough to function,

and we’ve got all this fucking dysfunction most of us which would just get settled.

But I think I have a solution.

Because I know what inside of myself

and in other people causes us to be dishonorably honorable.

And I could beg you to read my blog,

or I could just ask you to live by this line.

Which I admit I only conjured until a few weeks ago, despite working on this thing for about a year.

Here’s my quote, here’s what I want you to take on.

People are about the passion for properly exploiting the agreed upon effective and moral dubiousness of linking anything or anyone to anything else.

You only need holidays as an example to see

what makes a person feel like a badass, when you call them an asshole.

Giving praise where it’s kind of due,

conforming but being creative,

trying to be strong but flexible with people.

We’re all TRYING TO BE A BALANCED BADASS.

If you can’t see what makes a person feel balanced, humanity doesn’t stand a chance.

Enough with the good and the evil.

Enough with the satire and the heartwarming dog photos.

Enough with the magnificent anime with endearing heroes who almost cause disasters.

Enough with the clever references to other pieces of media.

Enough with the half-satisfying takedowns of people on the other side of the fence that don’t do fucking anything to change them.

Enough with people treating their families half like garbage and half like they really matter.

And especially, fuck people gaining extreme satisfaction out of making things inconvenient for others, who suck at fitting in society.

I’ve seen so much fuckshittery

and I’ve reached a point where the passion inside of me to change it all

has me screaming inside with hope for change far greater than any of your political superheroes.

Fuck it all. For one day, fuck it all.

Just think about what makes people feel bizarrely and uncuttably dignified.

And try to slice through that,

and cut yourself in the process too.

The name of my sword:

People are about the passion for properly exploiting the agreed upon effective and moral dubiousness of linking anything or anyone to anything else.
_____

Holidays are cool and all, since you’re not really forced to celebrate them.

But you want to know what makes them kind of shitty?

It’s someone trying to insist that you should be doing something to honor something else.

Like asking someone to meet with you to settle a dispute,

like expecting a message back on social media even when you respect their right to not talk to you.

Holidays are emotionally and socially attached and not attached attempts at weaving meaning from the past, so that the future can be better.

We really don’t talk about future weaving enough when talking about who’s got the right kind of justice.

No matter how much you make fun of someone’s culture,

they’re still using the uncanny ability to make someone somewhere much kinder.

You can’t change cultures any more than we have because

People are about the passion for properly exploiting the agreed upon effective and moral dubiousness of linking anything or anyone to anything else.

That’s right, modern values ain’t changing third world countries until we get our own fuckery sorted out.

Having a comfortable distance between your intents and your actions,

that’s what makes people feel so fucking balanced and elegant

when dealing with each other and the world.

Everyone besides the silliest of small children

is filled with detachment from themselves when they take drastic actions.

It’s that distance from oneself which inspired oneself to be proud of being a badass.

Everyone else has got that same energy flowing out of them, trying to use their version of being a good person as a motivator for selfish interests.

And don’t we manifest this in so fights in movies?

We have been trying to unwrap our fucked up heroism because

People are about the passion for properly exploiting the agreed upon effective and moral dubiousness of linking anything or anyone to anything else.

I wanted to to keep writing, but I might have to take a break.

All those street fights, all that Karen shit, all that immigration stuff,

all that voter fraud fiasco, all the bitching about nations at war, all the complaining about the environment,

all the wistful wishing for the internet to somehow make people better instead of more savage.

I don’t hate people for any of this.

But it all might change if people understood that

everyone feels like the mother fucker showing restraint and discretion.

Everyone holds back a little.

Everyone is ready to correct mistakes.

Everyone is ready to cooperate.

Everyone is ready to work hard to be a good person.

What pisses us off is when other people

are trying to exploit that shit for their own gain

But they don’t feel guilty, why?

Why are people so eager to fuck around with others?

Because people are ready to exploit themselves,

and are proud to navigate their time in this universe

by making big changes, and taking unexpected turns,

and being strange, and letting go of some of their own dreams.

People don’t feel shame in exploiting others because they’re masters of exploiting themselves.

Most of what people see as evil and fucked up

isn’t so different from their own version of being a hero.

The real villain in humanity isn’t prejudice, or selfishness, or fear, or love, or disgust, or primal instincts, or superstition, or ideology, or the distribution of resources.

Your big bad is this: people working hard to sift through the bullshit involved in trying to do good things and feel dignified,

and falling madly in love with how properly nasty it felt to do what allowed that goal to be achieved.

People are almost always working hard at being nice.

Or at least, they’ve respected that dream.

Or they have some admiration for the challenge to get other people to like you for seeming nice.

So much shit you think is depraved is really just people being the interesting exception

to the “sharing and caring” stuff they were taught by growing when they were 4 goddamn years old.

I’ve got a dream. And it’s a very big dream.

And no, it’s not some kind of “everybody act like they’re a nice little fairy” dream.

It’s the day when one person looks at another person in the eyes

and sees the game the other person is playing.

That’s all I want.

That’s all we need.

I don’t know about the whole world,

but when I see what’s going on in my country,

I think the biggest colossal gap inside our intellect

is not seeing other people as far-flung possibility makers and unusual dignity cravers.

The lust to make the possibility of unlikely dignity somehow be born,

that’s what we share.

It’s obvious that

people are about the passion for properly exploiting the agreed upon effective and moral dubiousness of linking anything or anyone to anything else.

But lets take it back to the level of people trying to get things done,

at the local and home level.

People, working, getting things done at home, being students,

disconnect themselves from responsibility, and it makes you furious,

so you end up connecting irresponsibility to them they might not even have,

because that indeed might make the world a more responsible place,

or perhaps because that helps you feel like you’re making a slash of justice.

People, employees, family members, service givers,

associate you with malice, when you haven’t got any,

so you end up ascribing hate to them you know they don’t have,

Attachment to things, detachment from things,

because that’s the human fucking game.

We’re all so used to being half sincere

that’s what we all are,

That’s all any one can ever be.

Connected and disconnected,

in the right way.

And I can see the threads that I want to cut and rearrange.

I want to do the last thing anyone ever gave an obscene amount of credit for.

And end up barely appreciated.

People working in supermarkets

get blamed for being things they didn’t do.

And nobody does anything about it.

We praise the victimized cashier,

we denigrate the bad customer,

but it remains something we don’t even teach children about.

We get our passion from how to be a good employee

from supernatural genocide anime.

Because the passion for creating possibility, weirdly, isn’t something we teach.

We wait until we’re out of school to find out how people will fuck with us.

We don’t even say the word retail a single fucking time in high school.

That’s where so many of us go right after,

and the education system acts like the world isn’t even built on grocery stores.

The world is built upon trying to balance respectable consistency and endearing flexbility,

but all we do is give teenagers hard homework

that is either done well or poorly,

ability and motivation creating obvious results.

The world’s not just about improving ability and summoning motivation…..for fuck’s sake, any good fiction could show you that.

Employees have to do work that they aren’t asked for. Deal with mother fuckers they’ve never met. Try to come out on top when customers and clients and being asses.

And they do so much shit they don’t get taught.

We don’t see the possibility kung-fu that people do when trying to get things done.

They don’t see the who’s the dignified one here swordplay people do when trying to order a fucking sandwich at a deli.

Students everywhere, age 11 and up, should have this in their classroom wall.

People are about the passion for properly exploiting the agreed upon effective and moral dubiousness of linking anything or anyone to anything else.

In my dream, people running a cash register will be respected

because they’re just trying to manipulate courses of events to prevent someone from being kind of a piece of a shit, in their lust for feeling respectable.

Navigating the possibilities in a social space is how the world works….

and we don’t even act like that’s something worth talking about.

Do we need historical fiction?

There’s as much depth

in somebody trying to buy a couch

as there is in any ancient epic.

The struggle to balance sincere helpfulness and necessary etiquette

is what it takes to become a good worker.

And we don’t put this in school.

If we do teach kids to value that struggle,

it’s only done in an extremely vain manner,

that congratulates people so much for fucking with others moralistically,

it just reaches the point of enabling powerful disgust for people who suck at commanding respect.

All you cultural overlords and justice warriors

are better off with those tentacles on your body getting cut off.

That’s right, everybody’s a cyborg,

and when we interact with other people,

we know that linking people, actions, intentions, and results,

and that also acting as though they may not be connected

is a very fucked up but proper thing,

but those four arms are very ready to pummel the arms of other people,

striking and dodging,

working together, maneuvering together,

creating weapons, cutting through themselves,

in a way that feels oh so very sleek and satisfying.

Human beings, their dreams, the things they do, and what comes from what they’ve done,

everyone knows that linking any of them together entirely is hogwash.

If you really thought person seems mean=person should be attacked, you’d be a fucking dog. And we’re not dogs.

You can see when people are trying to weave results from a purpose.

The human attack dog feels so much more sure about assaulting their prey.

Because they know they don’t disagree with the justice of taking out an enemy.

I don’t know if I can end war,

but if we can make the social wars that happened every day more civil,

maybe the richest and strongest nations could be a little more responsible.

They might be able to see who actually literally doesn’t get off on what inside of us gets a warmonger off.

No more fucking fighting, eh? Leave it to video games.

All you gotta do is see what’s happening when someone is trying to be flexible with you.

See the blame, the deflection, the sincerity, the desperation.

It’s about coming on top despite the social agonies.

That’s what I do. That’s what you do.

That’s what heroes do. That’s what villains do.

That’s what we all do.

We try to fucking navigate the possibilities that could happen.

We try to feel good about ourselves for the things we did.

Some people get off on making conflicts where they shouldn’t be,

because that leads to so many noble goals getting completed.

People make heroes out of people who barely deserve it,

because that’s how anyone and everyone wants to feel

when their dreams are being made worthless.

I want to see that day come, where we don’t need heroes anymore.

No more fucking fighting. At least not with those tears of pride coming down your face.

People, actions, intents, and results. Linking any of them together is weird. Separating them is also bizarre. And that’s the weapon we carry when we go outside.

We cut and link things to suit what feels like a dignified way to move through spacetime.

Use that sword without acting like a bandit. Be more like a samurai or some shit.

Wield the way you fuck with other people without being so honored by being capable of that such swordplay.

That’s all it’s gonna take to make humans “nice to each other”. That’s all.

Take that bizarre blade you carry that magnetizes ill intent onto people before cutting them,

And use it without the same joy.

This is the only way for us to become kinder than we are.

That’s the next stage of civilization beyond the bitchy shitty kindhearted closeness of the internet.

We’re tuning up its power to make us better people.

If we were to finally start being nice to each other,

would that not become a holiday?



But no matter who does what,

whether or not anyone respects me in the slightest,

this remains the only phrase that could ever cut through the current cultural landscape.

I’m extremely proud of it, and I hope you do something with it.

The next time you blame someone for something you know they aren’t quite,

but don’t feel like a hypocrite,

let the power of this statement guide you.

Write it on your fucking arm.

People are about the passion for properly exploiting the agreed upon effective and moral dubiousness of linking anything or anyone to anything else.

Have a good night, America.



L1’s Almanac: Why Cognitive Dissonance is Intellectually Vapid Horsesh*t

This isn’t even worth a diatribe.

I could go on for a while about how much I hate that term.

When somebody blames someone else for something that they’re barely even doing,

you call that cognitive dissonance.

When somebody props themselves us for achievements,

and you hate them for it,

you call that cognitive dissonance.

And then when you try to empathize with someone and start to see where they’re coming from,

you call them ASSHOLE.

While their friends call them badass.

Cognitive dissonance may really exist in the minds of foolish adolescents.

But how is it a good explanation,

when so much cognitive dissonance is congratulated so fiercely?

Because it’s not as stupid as you think- it’s something you support in other people.

Exploiting the friction between purpose and result.

Navigating the lack of justifiable connection intentions and actions.

Everyone is playing the game of

giving themselves more dignity than they deserve,

because that’s what everyone else is up to.

Any hateable person’s behavior stems from their desire to feel like

they’re just the right kind of undeserving of glory.

Do you think a term like cognitive dissonance can save people from being prejudicial fuckshits?

No. Because people navigate the possibilities of life

while others lust for them as well.

You don’t even see what humans aspire to- that is, already unlikely dignity.

You’re right in that it’s wrong to discriminate.

But you’re far off the fucking mark as far as changing anyone.

I don’t really get hateful on this blog.

But what I hate is the way your cheekbones get erect when spewing lingo like cognitive dissonance,

when you know it’s not changing any fucking one in this political era.

The emotion we did not decipher: The passion for exploiting the agreed upon dubiousness of linking anything or anyone to anything else.

If you think my post offensive, I’m just gonna let you know,

the raging empathy I feel toward other people is encapsulated in my other posts, all of them, much better than this one. This is literally the worst post I’ve ever made here, because I’m getting burned the fuck out not seeing the world change.

Cultural Rave- This One’s About Hugh Mungus and Dunkin’ Donuts

A donut store, a coffee shop, a food-eating place,

decides to boldly sever a part of its name.

Left without the thing that made it what it is, it acts disconnected,

though not quite, from much of what made it so successful.

Strangely endearing, strangely frustrating, to try and refine one’s image by conforming to a trend of slicker branding.

But is it not so much like the person who is a tad to desperate to see unforgivable lewdness in someone else’s provocative jokes?

That person is a bitchy bitch, but also a heroic hero. Going after that which seems to distance itself from responsibility, and antagonizes a desire to promote civility, so very loosely and informally, looks to me like that which anyone should be adored for so dearly.

His antagonist makes me smile with shame, but I cannot say she is a totally trashy. There is still a place for calling out passive aggressive humiliation that may be related to some other sort of prejudice. I still am kind of glad that we would have people like her.

As for the other party, the man who suddenly invokes a punchline-sort of absurd name for himself, I understand why people praise him so much.

He counters her encounter, in which she insists on proving that his desire to shield his identity had more offensive goals, linked somehow to unkind urges.

This man ensnares her in her own antagonism, deftly avoiding justifications for her accusations, but at the same time, he enforces his goal of making her look rather foolish for even wanting to accuse a stranger like him……of anything resembling that which we call sexist.

He is, perhaps, fighting against the despair of someone being wrongfully called so prejudiced, for doing or saying things which barely intended demeaning of anyone else, which were only motivated by trying to keep his identity a secret and aggravate a paparazzi sort of person.

What started as the desire to defect and provoke a nosy news gatherer,

turned into some strange crusade, which was further deflected

Some of you see him as godlike.

Because trying to shake off the advances of someone trying to associate you with things neither of you know might not really be a fault of yours is such a common human interaction.

What you adore in Hugh Mungus is that which I want to expose.

If I can deconstruct what it is that draws you to someone like Rudy Pantoja Jr., perhaps you might see me as a person with a bit of value, as someone who is justified in believing the internet might bring us closer together as a species.

Zarna vs Hugh, a battle where disconnection and connection came into play.

A situation as epic as that of a gripping early novel chapter.

A gratifying microcosm of our social media world.

Perhaps most so because the apparent loser is not indeed someone you can hate, since she has clearly been dealt a few bad hands by people. And yet, this makes Hugh rather endearingly merciful.

He doesn’t really accuse her of anything. Of course, it’s his ability to play around her game of blame which might make other people rather furious. Whatever he has is something that someone could use to potentially really get away with their misdeeds.

I can see the shining fury in the eyes of people in these situations.

It is a bizarrely endearing situation, but I am bizarre enough that I can strip it down to the found emotion- that is, the passion for exploiting the agreed upon dubiousness of linking anyone to anything in a way that feels dignified more so than others have.

Obviously, it is strange to antagonize this fellow, to make a crass man to be a committer of sexual harassment.

It is obviously not appropriate to imply that you might have something on you that is humungous.

People graft things onto others that they may only barely possess, they defend against accusations they know aren’t too foolish.

We can see when someone is trying to weave dignity out of traditionally rude or vile behavior, and most likely, we will either love them for it, hate them for it, be surprised at their absurdity, or laugh at their devotion to some kindness.

Just as a company rebranding itself so slightly, moving away and not away from its past, is impressive and vexing, a person embodying behavior you see as crude but elegant, is something you praise heavily.

And this is where I think the key and the lock to figuring out why people can be such pieces of shit to each other might finally be dusted off.

To you, who is quite fond of this folk hero, imagine some subset of humanity that really pisses you off. Let’s take an ideology, maybe a country, maybe a website. Just focus on what makes you despise them.

They have their own Hugh Mungus. To them, you are the silly person trying to get you to look like you haven’t got a shred of dignity.

They have their own folk hero, who seems to be everything that other people hate about that such culture, which makes their own cultural pride so very hard to cut through.

They have their own Zarna, a slightly affectionate stereotype of someone trying to mock their ability to try and make good things happen to neighbors. From the perspective of (people) in (group), you’re the meme worthy bitch.

Cultural pride is born from the ability to navigate situations, and toss one’s dreams of dignity into the future in a very very bizarre sort of way.

People from that culture know it is foolish to insist that anyone has helped anyone be anything resembling virtuous.

But everyone else is playing the same game, of ugly but endearing writhing through a social situation.

And somebody has to be doing that better than anyone else.

This is why the sword of satire doesn’t kill hypocrisy the way you wished it did. People adore the sloppy hail mary pass toward justice.

This is how people change, but not really. They just learn to make different kinds of hypocrisy their favorite. And this isn’t really even a flaw.

Because you can’t be a non hypocrite, because when you align intentions and dreams with space and time, things will never always go the right way.

You adore the cosmic energy in doing the evil-ish right thing to do. And aware of your mischief, you take solace in seeing real bastards manage to reach their goals which are hard to call selfish.

And this is what I want to cut down.



I personally would like to make a world where nobody needs a folk hero, where we can strike gutters in trying to be a good person without getting upset,

but not worship people for dancing so crudely toward their ideals.

You look at these heroes, and think, the dance toward amazing elusive dignity marches on.

But I want to stop this parade.

I believe I have a way to stop the aching for fucked up superheroes.

Both bastards in this situation

should not be your source of inspiration.

You should aspire to knowing just what gets you off so hard

in trying to turn any situation into an implication for other situations.

Perhaps it’s the fact that everyone else is trying to exploit

knowing that no one situation barely matters?

You are and are not exceptional.

My dream is exceptionally humungous,

but it is just like everyone else is.

Where we thread the needle of not being an asshole,

with no badasses involved.

I’m gonna go eat a donut

and fantasize about nobody getting high on flawed heroes.











The Found Emotion.com – 10 Examples of the Emotion I Discovered

Welcome, stranger. Give me a bit of your time, and you will become a different person.
See that tagline up there? Yes, I’m bold enough to insist that there’s an emotion without a name. I’ve described it up there. Let’s move forward.

1.  Shut the fuck up Apple, You don’t own Charlie Brown

There are people “generously” allowing Christmas specials from 50 years ago to be broadcast on public TV channels, but they mostly control who can actually show them much more tyrannically before making the purchase.  You might see this as abject hypocrisy, but isn’t being halfway between tyrannical and generous the only way a human being can ever come out on top?  Isn’t controlling the possibility of satisfaction in other people what we already worship anyone else for ever doing?  It would require something bigger than anything we’ve got to unwrap that kind of very tame sort of evil.  

People exchange the rights to content to what other people have made.  There’s always someone profiting.   If you want to end the cycle of bitching about corporate strength, you have to change what exists inside of us that makes us so ready to praise people for owning anything that other people want.

(you must be willing tame the dignity inside of imbalanced power, for the world to change)


2. Because I was born into this internet world

You’ll find that highly revered protagonists and antagonists will say things like “I just keep moving forward”.   You might know which I’m talking about.

You, filled with something in between admiration and disgust, get so many shots of adrenaline watching them move forward with their plans to bring change to the world, no matter how brutal, no matter how much they relate to their enemies. 

You feel something really powerful about these characters but you can’t fucking put it into words.    I have put it into words, my internet friend.

To “move forward” ambitiously, brutally, is to simply have a magnificently imperfect detachment to oneself.  That’s all anybody has praised anyone else for having.  

Fiction itself has a purpose.  The desire to bring people together has a final season.  I want to bring about that season.  The day when we stop treating each other like garbage. 

If the world is to move forward, and I am to be a part of it for some time, I will make humankind less ugly.

(you must be willing to see storytelling as a goal with a finale, for the world to change)


3.  Human Exploitation as explained by Pokemon Puzzle Challenge

Have you played Panel De Pon?     Or many of its clones?   There are many things you can learn from that game.  If you put into the context of The Found Emotion (the passion for exploiting the agreed upon effective or moral dubiousness of connecting anything or anyone to anything else at all).  But I’ll tell you the most interesting that I found.  

I remember being 10 years old, and frustrated that a certain type of block-switching mechanic didn’t count toward a combo bonus in block destruction.  And I was strangely pleased, however, by certain combos that actually did work.   

For the disadvantage, I was frustrated despite not fully blaming the game developers for how the feature worked.  For the advantage, I was pleased despite thinking the game might be better designed if things didn’t work for me.   It took me so many years, but I solved something.   

I could see why it’s so hard to cut through other people’s opinions- because they already know self-interest is flawed, they already know criticizing others is silly.  They’ll take the most pleasure in joy that feels the right kind of forbidden. 

They’ll be ready to see other people being unfair and cruel as captivatingly permissible in certain contexts.  And when those rules get broken, a higher level of rage forms.  Because they are convinced they do indeed relate to the lust for power other people have.

(if you want the world to change, you might need to see why you love games)

4.  No Accent?  Are you kidding me?  No.  Okay.

I was in a high school musical…in high school of course.  I met a friend of sorts who insisted she did not speak Chinese despite having a Chinese accent.  

She was a very nice kid, who couldn’t have been joking.

Depending on where you grow up, depending on what happens to you, people will assume many things about you.  Things become part of you that have a few degrees of connection less than others would assume. 

Learning a language tends to lead to having an accent, but it doesn’t necessarily.    Having an accent can be a result of other people having an accent.  I would say this girl’s parents didn’t want her to speak Chinese and never chose to use it around her, and surrounded by so many people of the same ethnicity, many of which were fluent, changing her voice, in that semi-voluntary way, never became appealing to her. She was practically destined to sound as though she spoke another language.

She was partly embarrassed, partly ready to insist it was no flaw to have an accent without a language to go with it.  She was a good cohort, we never got to a conflict about it.  Of course now I wouldn’t bat an eye at anyone exhibiting any sort of unexpected sociolinguistic trait. This shit is just how things are when you live in a great American city.

If you associate someone with something, is that a fault of your own?   If you’re inspired to change, are you trying to change yourself, or alter something inside of you that you don’t actually possess?  

Do you think that offensiveness might have a mechanic to it you haven’t explained? Do you think all the bitching and moaning about who’s being offensive might be a story with an end? It’s all about people acting detached from themselves, and wanting to attach things to other people that they know they might not have.

(you must be willing to see intercultural harmony as having a weird solution that has little to do with any of the whiners on either side)

5.   Free to Play by the what the fuck did you just call it you little bitch

 Free-to-play video games certainly are aggravating, aren’t they?    You could talk for a long time about how disgusting it is for someone to exploit free video games with payments you don’t really have to make.

But I am on another level.  I am here to tell you that you get the most mad at people when they pull on the rope in your heart that knows the world operates on the tension between what things are made for or should be for versus what they actually do or may do. Your “heart” is a clothesline that knows nothing is quite connected to anything else, but that purposes need to be fulfilled anyway.

A free-to-play video game that promises free gameplay does indeed provide free gameplay.  But the developers are acting detached from the true purpose of the video game, to make money from those who want to go further.   The free part of the game has the essence of payment inside it.  You can feel the marketing team’s cheeks clench with ecstasy as other decide to make the payment to level up their character or desperately vie for just a few more loot boxes, which only contain the possibility of getting the items you want to get.

It doesn’t matter who actually benefits from the paid system, who doesn’t really mind the exploitation, or who gets the luckiest among them.     Because inside of that joy, that lack of criticism, that utter exception to the misery of those who can’t afford to pay more money, is still, however light, a connection to the will to create oh so very much frustration in the gamer base.

And yet that frustration is not the goal.     The goal is money.    And that makes you angrier.    And those people telling you to just pay out the ass and shut up make you even angrier, because they act like you should just try and enjoy the game.  And the defend the game developers, saying they already give you things for free, and you know it’s silly to complain about a free game, and your eyes start glowing red hot because you see this as the hidden essence of what makes people such abject pieces of garbage toward each other!  And you can’t even fucking talk because you’re foaming at the mouth.

And then, you read my blog.  Because the world operates on connection and disconnection, as reality just moves forward. 

Every person who has ever told you, “you must listen to me” or “you must follow my ideology” was wrong, because they never admitted to themselves that the world is weaved together upon nothing quite working as it should.  People follow others, and fail, and succeed, and fail and succeed, and it just keeps going on.  The failures of the ideology become something to build off of, rather than irrelevant failures.    And those people who became its heroes became so praised because they are not quite only working for themselves, or to prove that they were right.

(until we see that we agree about the faultiness of linking anyone to anything, human conflict will just barely get more dignified)

6.   For my karaoke companion with the meh music taste

I have a friend with whom I like to sing karaoke.  We don’t really like each other’s taste in music.   But somehow, the music becomes better because it’s us who’s singing.  The sounds of the songs actually become more pleasant because we are the ones producing them.  Because we have a vested interest in becoming closer to one another, and take pleasure in each other releasing energy as we sing our songs inside the karaoke booth.

WOW ISN’T THAT WEIRD?    IT’S NOT SO WEIRD IN THE CONTEXT OF THE FOUND EMOTION.  THINGS BECOME ASSOCIATED WITH WHAT WE ASSOCIATE THEM WITH, AND THEY REMAIN UNLINKED.   IF ONLY WE COULD USE THIS TO MAKE HUMANS TREAT EACH OTHER MORE NICELY

7.  A fake Halloween costume

 On Halloween, I saw a little girl with her mother cozying to a woman who appeared to be distributing direct mail flyers throughout the neighborhood.  She might have assumed it was a costume.  I thought, how bizarre of an event, how hilariously innocent of this child to assume a worker was playing around. If she was.

EXCEPT THE LATER ME PUT IT INTO THE CONTEXT OF “PERFECT INAPPROPRIATENESS”, WHICH IS ALL HUMAN BEINGS EVER SEEM TO ASPIRE TO BE

YOU CAN’T CHANGE PEOPLE EASILY WHEN THEY ALREADY SEE THEMSELVES AS BEAUTIFULLY OUT OF PLACE

8.  Literal Figurative Fascism

People calling each other dictators and fascists is really strange, right?   We’re so tired of it, and yet, it seems very apt in some cases.  What the heck are you gonna do?

I’LL GIVE YOU THE ANSWER, CALLING PEOPLE FASCISTS IS AS RIGHT AS IT IS WRONG, BECAUSE IT’S FOOLISH TO COMPARE ANYONE’S ACTIONS TO WORSE ACTIONS, BUT KNOWING PEOPLE ARE READY TO DO SO IS WHAT INSPIRED THE WORST OF GENOCIDE

YOU CAN’T END THE CYCLE OF HATRED BY TELLING A STORY WHERE A SMALL GROUP OF TRAUMATIZED HEROES MANAGES TO MAKE THINGS WORK

People are always knowing they’re not quite the exception, and everyone else is good at being not quite the exception.

9.   The Lockhorns is you

Two people I’m living with, one of them was very lost and having lots of trouble.   Asking, crying for help over the phone, the other person still felt offended because of this person’s frustrated and judgmental tone with the help that they were getting.   I couldn’t help but wish I had the solution.  I wanted both of them to get less livid at each other.

IS THIS NOT HOW ALL DOMESTIC DISPUTES WORK? NO ONE IS ACCUSING THE OTHER OF EVIL, BUT EVERYONE IS ALWAYS TAKING THE CHANCE TO PROVE WHAT SOMEONE ELSE IS MADE OF.  IT’S ALWAYS A LITTLE ABOUT WHAT OTHER PEOPLE THINK OF YOU, AND NOT JUST WHAT YOU DO.  TRYING TO GET THINGS OUT OF OTHER PEOPLE ALWAYS IMPLIES SOME DEGREE OF TESTING SOMEONE ELSE’S WORTH.   FOR FUCK’S SAKE HUMANITY, STOP THIS SHITSHOW.     THE SOLUTION IS NOT TO SHUT UP AND BE NICE, IT’S TO NAVIGATE THE URGE TO BE THE COOL EXCEPTION TO NICENESS EVEN IF THAT IS MORE LIKELY TO WEAVE SOMEONE’S BENEVOLENT GOALS

I unironically believe that someday, we won’t have to mock husband-wife-relationships in newspaper comics.

10.  Spicy Food and the Dream of a Hateless World

Isn’t spicy food so fascinating?    It is a pleasure that becomes a kind of pain.   

We become proud of eating it despite liking the taste.      Our previous pain becomes a later pleasure.  Other people eating the spice and not liking it makes us proud of what we can gain from the spiciness. 

We mock others for not liking spicy food, even though our pride depends on upon their weakness.  But it’s just a food thing, right? And yet that makes us prouder of ourselves for not eating cooler tasting herbs.     So we go online and smirk about how not not not great we are for considering hot salsa to be mild.

And we don’t unwrap the contrast.  We don’t find the kindness.    We don’t see the balance.  We have it and we don’t use it.   

Everyone knows other people matter as much as they don’t, that opinions are as tiny as they are huge, that greatness is never too worth honoring, that evil is never truly all that savage.

And we move forward, being fairly good to each other, as we are in modern society.

But the flaws fall apart.  And result in the America we have.

All that political stuff, do I even need to say any more?


I AM ON FIRE

YOU MUST READ MY BLOG


UNWRAP THE CONTRADICTIONS

CHANGE HUMANITY

CHANGE YOURSELF

LET HUMAN DIGNITY FIND ITS FINAL LEGS SO THAT IT CAN WALK

WE ARE SO CLOSE

YOU JUST HAVE TO COME WITH ME

THIS IS A DECLARATION OF WAR ON THE MEDIOCRITY WE HAVE ALLOWED TO ROAM THIS EARTH

NOW HAVE YOURSELF A DRINK AND GO OUTSIDE AND DON”T USE THE INTERNET FOR ANYTHING BUT THIS BLOG FOR QUITE SOME TIME